Posted on May 26, 2015
Four weeks ago I was in the throes of packing for a long-anticipated trip to England and Scotland. I had just heard the devastating news that my father had suffered a near fatal fall and was undergoing both brain and spinal surgery. My emotions were all over the proverbial map; from excitement, to despair, fear to hope.
I continued on my quest to find answers to the questions that plagued my every moment. What am I supposed to do with my life? What are my gifts? Who am I? What is going to make me happy, and where am I supposed to be? I pushed aside any feelings of guilt I had about going on such a self-indulgent adventure and moved forward in faith.
I really hoped I’d figure things out. I hoped I’d have a spiritual awakening. I hoped a flash of inspiration would blind me with clarity and direction. I hoped I’d find parts of myself that had fractured off in past lifetimes and that I’d be restored to my full potential and power.
What happened? Where did the time go? How can I already be back? It seems like just yesterday I sat here at my desk penning my first blog post about my trip with the expectation that there would be at least two a week to keep my fans enthralled. Yeah. What happened was the trip of a lifetime.
I was the tourist from hell. I saw everything I possibly could, walked everywhere my feet would carry me, soaked in every sound and savored the fragrances on each breath. There was so little time to write. I had to catch trains and busses and sunrises and theatre curtains. I had to make the most of every moment, so that I could bring them home with me to revisit and decipher at a later time.
Are the fruits of my grail quest a teacup from Kensington Palace, spring water from the Chalice Well, and a cashmere scarf from Edinburgh? Hardly. A boost in self-confidence from the knowledge that I succeeded in doing what I set out to do and saw most of what I set out to see. I conquered the trials and adversities of traveling as a woman, alone in foreign lands and I learned a great deal. Most precious of all were the encounters I had with so many blessed, wonderful, unexpected people.
Now, back in the seat of my routine life, I will take the time to relive my quest, day by day and begin to mine it for all of its treasures. I’ll be able to express what happened.